Hi all! I know it’s been a while and you probably think I forgot about or gave up on my blog.  That is not true. I’m still around, I just haven’t been here. What have I been up to in the last month since I disappeared? Everything and nothing, that sort of thing.  Yes I still have my random funny thoughts when I stop at red lights.  Yes, James does things everyday that make me wonder ‘where he got that from’. I’m still searching for that hole in my Boston Cream donut, still bitching about people peeing on toilet seats… I know the last time I blogged, I made a list of things to ‘cover’ and then I went through the list.  I didn’t make a list this time.   I feel like being honest at the moment but I feel that my brand of honesty is too abrasive for most people so that’s why I’ve sort of retreated a bit.  Example: the other weekend I call a good friend a doormat.  While true, it was rude to say.  So there.  I’m around, if you need me, you know where to find me.  Want to show me love? Send sheet music, I’m feeling very much like a tortured soul lately.

-Cindy

Turn right, go left… a long week!

This is the long-awaited blog… it will be a bit all over the place since it’s been a while. There will no seque-ing, just switching topics.

I guess I should start this long blog off with the trip to the hospital last Saturday.  I had a very sore throat and James was sort of wheezing.  Being that it was Saturday, we had to go to the ER at NAS Jax across town.  When we got there we were both seen and I was given a shot for my throat and James was given breathing treatments.  I was eventually discharged and James was (after much hemming and hawing) admitted.  One of the doctors had a ‘feeling’ and just couldn’t let him go. So I thought he would receive breathing treatments through the night and then be discharged the next day. Well, the doctors kept him and kept him for the next three days until they finally were confident that he could keep his oxygen saturation up above 94% on just room air.  He was officially diagnosed with asthma and was sent on his way with a handful of inhalers and steroids late Tuesday afternoon.  Obviously this is a very truncated version, but I really don’t feel like going over it again.  We’ve all been to the hospital and we all know how much of a pain it can be, please insert your experiences here and know that it wasn’t much different.   

Want to hear the worst knock-knock joke ever told?  It started off with the best intentions of teaching James his full name.
James: Knock knock!
Me/Josh/nearest victim: Who’s there?
James: uh…James? (just like that, always with the ‘uh’)
Me/Josh/nearest victim: James who?
James: uh…Glover (pronounced “Druver”)
AND REPEAT!! dozens and dozens and hundreds of times, hence the nearest ‘victim’ comment.

When I went to work on Wednesday, the boss Mike was rearranging (as he always does- it’s sort of his thing and we always tease him about it) and he asked me if I wanted a different desk. I told him of course, because my current desk had no drawers or any storage  of any kind.  Just a flat plane in which to place my computer and files on.  The next thing I know he’s pushing the old office manager, Laura’s desk over and swapping it with mine.  Let me just say that Laura’s desk is the huge executive type with cubby holes and sliding keyboard drawer and a filing draw.  It is the exact opposite of what I had before and I feel very important/very silly sitting at it. 

The other day Josh was telling me that he wanted another tattoo and he was saying he wanted to get it right here and he was pointing to places on arm.  I was so surprised because I didn’t know that he had picked out a design… only to find out that he is still waiting on me to draw it! That was a surprise to me…

I decided it was time to redecorate our bathroom and we made a trip to Wal-Mart to pick out new things.  We looked at themes and decided against them and decided to just go with colors and finally went with teal.  But I didn’t want to do EVERYTHING in teal, so I decided to mix it with black.  Well, we got everything in the cart and suddenly the color combination looked very familiar… like the black and teal of the Jacksonville Jaguars!  So now our bathroom looks very spirited but I really like the color combination and the light shining through the teal shower curtain makes the bathroom look like an aquarium.  The real downside, black towel are VERY lint-y.

We went to see Willy Wonka at the Alhambra last night and it does NOT adapt well to stage.  It was bad.  Dirty Rotten Scoundrels is the next show and I expect it be better!

And I’ll end this blog on a sad note: my little jersey boy James.   As you all know, James was born in New Jersey where navigating the roads can be an olympic sport.  Being a ‘jersey girl’ has always had a negative connotation in my mind (slutty) and I fought against people calling my baby a jersey boy for similar reason. (Has anyone seen Jersey Shore…yeah)  But I don’t know if it can be denied anymore.  It all started with Cars (yes, the movie).  There is a point in the movie where the older racecar tries to teach Lightning McQueen that on dirt, you have to “turn right to go left.”  To me, this smacks of a New Jersey concept if I ever heard one.  (If you’ve ever driven there, you know what I mean and if you haven’t, I’ve google a few picture for you.-yes these are average intersections)
     

Confusing?  Yes, you have to effectively make a u-turn in a jughandle any time you want to turn left.  You have to turn right, to turn left.  What does this have to do with James?  It’s one of his favorite quotes from the movie.  “Turn right, go left.”  My little jersey boy seems to understand…

-Cindy

Outbursts

I have to laugh when people have out bursts but don’t actually swear.  Ned Flanders is a Fine-diddily-ine example of what I mean.  Examples: 

  • fiddlesticks!
  • horsesense
  • poppycock
  • pish-posh
  • balderdash
  • Shiitake!
  • Fudge! (Fuck)
  • -insert all words that sound like swear words that you say at the very last second.

I know there are instances that you shouldn’t swear like at work or in front of uptight relatives, so I guess I can’t COMPLAIN about the usage BUT it wont stop me from laughing it them.  Go on, say poppycock.  See if the people around don’t laugh.

So feel free to add to my list, I made it on the fly and I’m sure I left a ton out.

-Cindy

 

An Eye For An Eye, A Tattoo For A Tattoo

I got these temporary tattoos from the Dollar Tree for James to wear and they are so hard to get off. He’s been wearing this soccer ball for the last week and a half with no sign of it washing it off. So tonight I scrubbed it off so that his teachers at school wouldn’t think we never bathe him.  Let me just say, you have to seriously scrub and his little arm was red by the time I was done.  It turns out I really upset-like mortally offended him by removing it and he threw an absolute fit.  So I offered to let him scrub the tattoos off my feet.  He was very pleased with those reparations and been scrubbing my feet for about twenty minutes.  (Shhh, don’t tell him the stars will never come off.) 
-Cindy

Movie day

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Yesterday we took James to see the Cars 2 movie. It was our first successful attempt at taking him to a movie in the theater and he had a blast. Can you believe a kids matinee movie was $6.25?! Anyway, as you can see James is not heavy enough to not get folded up into the seat and I thought that was really cute. We ended up getting him a Tow Mater toy that he’s been begging for. It’s his favorite character.
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-Cindy

High

Well, I spent the day high for no good reason.  Let me explain befor you think you’ve learned taboo something about me.  I was scheduled to have an IUD inserted today and was instructed to take a hydrocodone beforehand. I NEVER take any sort of pain meds much stronger than one Tylenol at a time, I just don’t react well to them BUT I was warned that the procedure would like hell from several people so I went ahead and took the stupid pill.  Well, I fainted in the waiting room.  After they take me in the back and fix me up, the docs go on to tell me that I couldn’t have it done today “in my condition” and then went on to “counsel” me into rethink getting it at all.  I say cousel loosely because it sounded like a giant scare sessions -all the horrors, pains, spotting. Look, I know the thing is expensive but but gee if you have to gang up on high faint-y girls and scare them out of it, don’t offer it.  So they told me to go home and think about it and then I went on to faint in the waiting room waiting for josh to come and pick me up.  Yeah.  So no more drugs for cindy.  I’m still a loopy right now but I’m coming down.

Ashes Ashes

The wildfires have been really intense in the Northeast of Florida.  Everything has smelled like a cook out for days, but not in a good way.  It’s cloying and you can feeling the smoke take up residence in your lungs like a cigarette that you can’t exhale.  The sky yellowed today like it would during a storm, but that was what happened yesterday.  The kind of storm that makes you wonder how close is too close when the lightning strikes.   Today the storm was ash.  When I left work today and made the short walk from the building to my car, ash swirled around me and rushed into my car as I opened the door.  It looked just like flurries in the winter except it wasn’t refreshing, it was suffocating.  The scent of the ash in the air was even strong enough to mask the scent of the gas at the gas station.  I don’t know why I stopped.  I worry about the people who are weaker than me, the ash was enough to keep even me inside today.  

On a side note, I hope that the thing caught in the back of my throat is a flecked of dried basil and not ash.  The almost minty feel of it points to basil, so I remain optimistic.  No one likes a dead tree in their throat, or anywhere else for that matter.

-Cindy